I really wish I had one of those red and blue nap maps you had in kindergarten right now…..

So last night I didn't get ANY sleep at all. I was tired enough that I should have slept like a rock, but I didn't. Ya know until a year ago I pretty much NEVER had nightmares. In the last year I've had a few that have really scared the shit out of me. Mostly centered around the death of loved ones. The dreams haven't really been so much about the death but about the fact that there was nothing I could do to stop it, change it, or bring them back. Last night it was Rachel's turn. I don't really know what happened but all I know is she was missing and presumed dead. By the time I got to her house, little white house on Elm Street, there was nothing for me to do but feed and water her cat and dog. Well that and wait. I awoke in a full panic. My emotions really got the best of me on this one. I think I've found a common theme in all these dreams. See here’s the deal as far as Rachel and Jarrett are concerned, wife or ex-wife I'm suppose to be there for them. Not necessarily to take out the trash or mow the grass but when things get tuff I'm the guy they can count on to be there. In these dreams for one reason or another I wasn't able to be there. I know in life you can't always be there 100% but damn it in my dreams I should be able to. I'm thinking one of those dream machines will take care of this problem. Annnyyyy Waaayyyy.... So needless to say I didn't sleep much last night. So I'm pretty much running on empty today. Well it's back to the ole grind.....

P.S. To any loved ones out there right now, don't have any emergencies or anything you may need someone to lean on until I get a nap.